What’s with all the blogging?

April 6, 2009 at 12:17 | Posted in Uncategorized | 4 Comments
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So a lot of people have been asking me lately, “what’s with all the blogging?”.

Sources tell me that blogging is actually the master plan of Bin Laden to keep sure that all the clever minds (me! me!) is kept occupied writing random crap on the internet to be read by other clever minds (you! you!). And while we are busy being clever, he cleverly takes over the world and rules us all.

Anyway, whether the rumour is true or not, I do definitely know for sure that blogs can save lives (only mild exaggeration)!

Yep!

As you know, I used to religiously read others blogs last year to pass my time in my old job (I used to finish my work faster than they could give me, so I had a lot of free time then). Anyway, when I realised that corporate life is not as exciting as I hoped it would be (don’t get me wrong, pay day is the best day), I thought maybe I should study some more (better degree=>better pay=>better pay days). Am I clever or what?

Long story short, I had to write the IELTS exam in order to apply to the universities abroad, to show them that I am proficient enough in English.

For those of you who don’t know, this exam has 4 sections – listening, reading, writing and speaking. Now in the speaking round, the interviewer generally asks you random questions to answer, and then gives you a topic, on which you have to speak for a minute.

The topic I got was “an interesting TV show that I saw recently”. Now I rarely watch TV, and when I do, its just for mindless gossip on celebrities, latest movies and songs, before I get bored of that as well, and turn it off. So when my interviewer asked me to talk about this particular topic, my mind went totally blank. I just couldn’t remember the last time I saw TV, let alone anything interesting on it. And it would seem totally chicken-ish (and probably negative marks), if I told the interviewer that I don’t see TV.

It was then that I suddenly, miraculously remembered this post by Chris (click away, its hilarious stuff). So I just narrated that post how I remembered it, to the interviewer. She bought my blabber and I passed! Woohoo!

Now thanks to reading that particular post, I have managed to get admissions in Universities. Thanks to reading that particular post, my future is safe(r) now. So it is only fair to humanity that I too start blogging, for you never know how my blog, maybe this particular post infact, saves you from a psychopath serial killer tomorrow.

Or not.

PS: Tomorrow, my good friend Arjun will be guest posting here, as I have a holiday, and I strictly don’t blog on holidays.

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It happens only in India (and Venezuela)!

April 2, 2009 at 01:58 | Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment
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So when I read this really funny post on Indian soaps (click!) the other day written by my friend, it reminded me of a particular Hindi serial that came on TV during my college years. The criticism of Indian soaps have been going on for quite a while now, so you may wonder what this post is all about?

For starters, it is not on Ekta Kapoor.

Secondly, this particular serial is a remake of a Venezuelan “telenovela”, as I found out from wikipedia, so we can’t blame really Indians for making this plot.

Anyway, here is the plot:

“Anu Sachdev is determined to fulfill her dreams of studying journalism from a prestigious university abroad, but she doesn’t know that the fate has already decided to change the course of her life. Anu is accidentally impregnated with a IVF sample by a gynaecologist she visits to have a routine checkup. A nurse had mixed up her file with another woman’s file. Anu doesn’t know she is pregnant and continues with her life.”

So when our day scholar classmate who saw the pilot episode narrates the plot to the rest of us boarders, we were speechless at the absurdity of the plot!

  • I mean, which unmarried+teenage+Indian girl goes for routine check ups with the gynaecologist? What was she expecting to find?!!
  • And if its for a routine check up, won’t she be aware of how its done usually, and so shouldn’t she notice that the doctor is doing something different, for example, injecting something suspicious into her, this time?
  • Ignoring the one-in-a-million odds of her getting pregnant from it, how long is it going to take her to realise that she is pregnant? A zillion episodes??
  • And once she does, why on earth isn’t she aborting the baby and ending the miserable series once and for all?

I don’t understand the human mind at all.

PS: The reason why the post is named so, is because soon after we overcame the speechless stage, our friend from Bhutan immediately started singing the famous movie song “It happens only in India“. But as I found out only recently, the plot is of Venezuelan origin

Kindergarten cops – to protect kids from each other

March 18, 2009 at 17:23 | Posted in Uncategorized | 6 Comments
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The following conversation happened last weekend between a 7 year old I know and his friend:

Kid-I-know: “Hey so did you see the latest episode of Pokemon yesterday?”

His-friend: “No way, I saw much cooler stuff yesterday. The mall near my house was celebrating their one year anniversary, and they had brought fire-eaters. Pokemon is so boring compared to that!”

Kid-I-know (feeling uncool at the moment for missing out the exciting fire-eating stuff): “Oh, fire-eaters. That’s not such a big deal.”

His-friend (feeling very grown-up by now on choosing fire-eaters over Pokemon): “Oh yeah? What is more exciting, watching men eat fire or some dumb cartoon that we get to see everyday?”

Kid-I-know (not wanting to be outdone): ” Pokemon is not dumb. And this fire eating business is not as cool as you think. Even I can do it.”

His-friend (definitely sure this was not how he imagined this conversation in his head): “Oh yeah?”

Kid-I-know: “Yeah!”

His-friend (his head stuck with oh yeahs): “Oh yeah?”

Kid-I-know: “Yeah!”

His-friend (finally finding other words to speak): “Well prove it!”

Kid-I-know realizes its too late to admit defeat now, goes into the kitchen and returns with a lit candle and a can of deodorant belonging to his brother.

He opens the can, holds the spray nozzle such that it faces the flame, and his own face close to the receiving end.

Ssssssssssss……….Whooooosh!!!

The flame erupts from the can to his face, barely missing his wide open mouth and almost burning him into soot like in the cartoons.

His-friend (jumps back, totally awestruck, scared and more importantly – jealous): “I’m telling your mum.”

(Runs off to find the actual grown-ups)

~~~~~~~~~

Now I am not entirely sure how the kid intended to eat the flames or where he learned the trick from or what the other kid’s thoughts are on loyalty to friends, but oh man! To think how boring my childhood was….neither Pokemon nor fire-eating friends. Was I born in the wrong century or what?!!

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