Does anybody know how to transfigure annoying people into manure? (Part 2)

June 8, 2009 at 11:35 | Posted in Uncategorized | 9 Comments
Tags: ,

(Continued from previous post)

I get into an auto, super sleepy from having woken up early in the morning to get off the train, and then waiting at the station till its safe to get out, bitten to death by mosquitoes that are possibly carrying dengue or malaria. Obviously I am not in the best of my moods. But the auto guy whose auto I got into was extremely chatty to the point of being an asshole.

(Note how hard I try to be civil by replying in monosyllables, instead of breaking his medula oblongata with my lethal karate chops)

Auto-dude: “So, where are you from?”
Me (fighting to stay awake): “Bangalore”
Auto-dude: “You studying?”
Me (wishing I’d actually studied to become a professional killer): “No”
Auto-dude: “Your home is here?”
Me (cursing myself for not having the power to teleport away): “No”
Auto-dude: “Oh, then why are you here?”
Me (cursing God for giving him the power of speech): “Work”
Auto-dude: “Oh, you’ve come here looking for work!”
Me (too pissed to care): “Yeah”
Auto-dude: “Why don’t you give me your cell number so that I can call you if I find some job you can do?”
Me (what the fuck?!!!): “Stop the auto, I’ll get down here”

The End.

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9 Comments »

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  1. hahahaha!!! .. good one!

    Thanks!

  2. hehehhe…..ahhh you know he probably was some rich dude incognito inorder to beat the recession blues….

    Or he was a pimp!

  3. Hey, this is a good one! I have become your admirer dear..oops, not yours..but the blogger in you. Keep it up!!

    Thanks! It is never too late to start complimenting me 😛

  4. I have heard that Ninja are lethal killers.. Better watch my back when i am within 20 paces of you. I wish there were (beautiful)female auto rickshaw drivers 😛 I would gladly give my number to any of them! he he he he

    And I wish I was tall. Life is never fair! 🙂

  5. Did this really happen in God’s own country??????????????

    Yep, in the capital, right under God’s nose.

  6. That would have been fun 🙂
    I also want a job but no one takes my number 😀
    [Actually I don’t need a job]

    Haha….

  7. Thats out of a movie or book not published yet!! 🙂

    Wouldnt have believed that out of the mouths of more than half the ppl i know!!

    Welcome to Kerala, my friend. Welcome to Kerala.

  8. thank god , you got down..else god know wat all he wud be asking…For that matter, those autowalas are better who know only the local language (tamil/kannada)……..we dont hv that problem…. these autowalas do not know my language..haha

    Even otherwise, you’re lucky cos you’re a guy.

  9. hahah..am sure he had a number of jobs in the gelf land..lol ..u just missed the bus 😀

    Gelf land! Lol!!


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